4 Ideas to Let Go Of if You’re Struggling With Losing Weight & Loving Yourself

4 Ideas to if You're Struggling With Losing Weight & Loving Yourself

Getting healthier and losing weight is a big decision. It’s something you show up for daily. It’s a commitment, a conscious choice, and let’s be honest – it takes effort.

The funny thing is that we’re conditioned to think that it’s mostly physical work that goes into achieving a weight loss goal – exercising more, choosing healthier foods, cooking more, etc.

And yes, all of these things definitely do make for a healthier you and are important (no doubt), but the real crux of the work for lasting change is in your mindset. What you think and expect going into your wellness journey.

Through my coaching work, time and time again, the most successful people are the ones who have let the below 4 ideas go.


If you’re looking to get healthier and love your body more, I highly recommend you work on letting these ideas go too.

#1 Let go of the idea that you can’t appreciate your body before you’re “thin enough”

This simply isn’t true. In fact, this belief is probably what’s holding you back. Allow yourself permission to be grateful and appreciative for your NOW, for YOU now, for who you are on a soul level now and what your body can do for you now.

For example, your body allowing you to walk to the grocery store, to lift that heavy weight at the studio, to effectively breathe, to see, to dance, to swim. Your body does so much for you that you likely don’t even realize because you’re too consumed with the idea that your body doesn’t look how you want it to look. (FYI: after years of coaching … there isn’t one woman I’ve ever met who wouldn’t change something about their body).

But, once you do this – once you begin practicing gratitude for who you are now and what your body allows you to do now – you’ll start having more courage to do all the things you’re not doing because you don’t think you’re worthy enough. And once you start doing those things, you’re going to get more self-acceptance and body love, which is what you’re really after in the first place.

Bottomline: show yourself some gratitude, bust out of your comfort zone, and do things you’re not doing because you don’t look how you think you should look (aka take the dance class, go to the gym, join the yoga studio, sign-up for the cooking class) – THIS – you taking action here – is where you’ll see real change.

#2 Let go of the idea that getting healthy is an isolated event

We’re brought up to think that we’ll get healthy and/or lose weight and then it’s over, we’re all set, we’re done. That’s a lie and it makes us feel really bad when we can’t live up to that unrealistic expectation. This is especially not true for the mind work involved in getting healthier and happier, which deals with constant reframing to find the light in the dark, using mantras and affirmations for self-love, mediation work, and breaking through beliefs that are holding you back.

Of course these are just some of the tools you can use here, but my point is that living a healthier life in mind, body, and soul is a lifelong practice not a single isolated event.

Your job is simply to show up every day the best you can with where you are with what you know in the moment. And yes, some days will be better than others, but the point is that you share the mindset of showing up daily.

real change takes time


#3 Let get of the idea that once you’re thin, you’ll be so much happier

Just like we’ve all known super wealthy people who are unhappy, we’ve all known thin people who aren’t happy. Happiness is an inside job. It comes from you and no one else can do it, but I guarantee that it starts with the mind and doing the inner work. The first on that list of inner work is usually compassion.

So show yourself some compassion. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself a break. You’re doing the best you can with where you’re at right now. And that’s what it’s about.

You may think it’s about getting to that next place or dropping another pound, but I promise that once you’re there, you’ll only want more. That’s the funny thing about being a human being.

But, if you appreciate your now (point #1) and continue to focus on the actions, thoughts, behaviors, people and foods that make you feel good and choose those, I promise you’ll naturally be where you want to be, and you’ll be so much happier and relaxed along your journey.


#4 Let go of the idea that you can decide the shape of your body

You can’t decide how you were built. You just can’t. I remember desperately trying to get the legs of Gisele Bündchen, as a teenager. When in fact, I have a fit round muscular shape to my thighs. I couldn’t make a different body shape happen no matter what (just wasn’t and isn’t possible – or natural) and when I tried, I ended up miserable.

So be honest with yourself and see what shape you have – apple, pear, slender, athletic, hourglass? And put all your energy into loving that shape. Nurture your body, treat it healthfully – don’t abuse it – and you will see beautiful change from the inside out.

This goes with our age too. Is looking like ourselves 10 years ago possible? No. But is treating our body well with good food, kind words and exercise possible? Absolutely.

Allow yourself to love yourself a little more and that’s when you’ll see real change.

If that’s hard for you, you may enjoy my free, 10-day self-love challenge 

I’d love to hear what hit home for you in the comments below.

With so much love XXO



:: Other articles you may love ::

:: 10 Reminders Any Woman on a Wellness Journey Needs to Remember About Food

:: 12 Unexpected Ways to Transform Your Relationship with Food & Yourself

:: 25 Things I Do To Love My Body (And How You Can Too)

:: The One Thing You Should Do if You’re Trying to Lose Weight

:: Are Your Beliefs What’s Really Keeping You Stuck in Dieting Craziness?