The Real Reason You’re Not Achieving Your Goal


The other day I was sitting at my desk. Fuzzy socks on. Sweats rolled up. Giant coffee mugs everywhere. Notebooks open. Curly hair piled high … Thinking. No – that’s a lie – I was more like on the verge of overwhelm…

But with a brief meditation session and the words from a past mentor ringing in my brain –  don’t get lost in your goal, focus on your actions –  I brought myself back down to a grounded space.

With those words, I flipped myself around like a hot breakfast pancake and finally started getting things done. I began to focus on my actions, NOT the outcome of achieving my goal.

And that’s what I want to remind you of today too.

You see, whatever your goal is right now, whether it be finding ever-after love, getting healthier, improving your relationship, landing a new job, starting your passion project – whatever makes your heart soar – don’t get bogged down by achieving your end goal.

Because what happens when we get so focused on achieving our end goal is that we easily become overwhelmed. And when we’re overwhelmed, we’re more likely to procrastinate. To put things off. To shrink. To be anxious. To feel like we’re not good enough. And perhaps to not try or to not try with our whole hearts.


So, I want you to try something radical.

Don’t focus on your end goal.

Instead, focus on your actions to get there.

My fiancé and I were talking about this on the ride home the other day.


Here’s the example I made him listen to (imagine serious, not super into personal development guy being babbled at, excitedly, by blonde super self-growth loving girl):

You see, you have to focus on the actions you need to take to achieve your goal; not your outcome. Because the outcome is overwhelming, which leads to not doing and then you’re really stuck! Think about it, it’s like when you have a breakup. When you’re going through your breakup, you can’t possibly think about your romantic end goal of meeting your ever-after person. NO! Instead, you have to focus on the actions of healing, of putting your pieces back together. Of just waking up the next day. And slowly, when you’re ready, you focus on the actions of meeting someone new to achieve your end goal. Because there’s no possible way you can focus on your end goal of meeting your ever-after upon a breakup … it’s just too daunting. You have to focus on the small actions … Revolutionary!


It’s the same for any goal – finding a new job, writing a book, starting a business, learning to set boundaries – you can’t just focus on the end goal of success; rather, you focus on actions needed to get there.

Because no one has ever accomplished anything from just having a goal. They accomplish from doing.

Plus, a huge part to this is that “the doing” makes you feel like you’re moving forward and owning your world and your life. And that’s a ginormous important piece to anyone’s puzzle, allowing you to stay inspired, motivated, and empowered; instead of anxious, fearful, and daunted.

So when you’re feeling down-and-out, unmotivated, or like you’re never going to get there, I want you to take a huge breath in, a huge breath out, and spend the next 48 hours focused on the “doings” of achieving your goal.

I promise you will see, but more importantly start to feel change.

Let me know.

With so much love,



p.s. I’m launching the grooviest program on self-love + food in January. Check it out HERE.